


Kiss me?

by Jessi_aka_pyro



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series), Thomas Sanders, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Hurt/Comfort, I'm so sorry, M/M, Make out fic, Panic Attack, Prinxiety - Freeform, Red eyes Roman, accidental angst, so much kissing like, woah
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-21
Updated: 2018-05-21
Packaged: 2019-05-09 17:16:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,139
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14720298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jessi_aka_pyro/pseuds/Jessi_aka_pyro
Summary: “I accept.”His eyes shot wide as he looked to Roman. “I- What?”“I accept your proposal to make out.” He faltered however, looking where he hoped Virgil’s eyes to be behind swooping bangs and a hood. “If the offer is still open I mean.”





	Kiss me?

**Author's Note:**

> This was literally just an excuse to write my two boys smoochin. Then it accidentally became angsty. Uhh. Sorry about that.

“Make out with me.”

 

“I- _What!?”_

 

Virgil watched as Roman looked from him to the tv and back to him, red eyes wide with an unreadable expression.

 

Virgil crossed his arms, blatantly ignoring the trickle of anxiety creeping in. “Make out with me?”

 

Roman stayed stubborn however, still staring at the darker character.

 

 _“Why on Earth would I make out with you. No wait. Why do you even_ want _me to make out with you!?”_

 

Looking away, Virgil sighed, pulling at the strings of his hoodie. “You’re right, sorry. It was dumb.”

 

“N-no, I wouldn’t say it was _dumb_ , exactly. Just… Unexpected? What in the world brought this on?”

 

Virgil bit his cheek, feeling himself warm up a little. Honestly, what was he expecting when he’d blurted out his question. It was kind of unfair to Prince as well.

 

Virgil had been having a rough day. Or well, more rough than on average. He couldn’t stop thinking back to the kiss Thomas and his current boyfriend had shared. Thomas was on cloud nine all day afterwards. Leaving Virgil feeling a little useless as even his vaguest worries didn’t seem to be breaking his thick bubble of happy.

 

It had been the kiss right? Thomas usually got like this after a first kiss. Virgil just… didn’t understand! He couldn’t comprehend how one small action could improve Thomas _that much_ . And then that had gotten him thinking about how nights when Thomas uhh… _copulate._

 

Besides the… obvious emotions that came with it, Virgil couldn’t understand how Thomas could feel high levels both anxiety and joy and still come out much better than before. Of course VIrgil kept his eyes averted when such nights happened, but he still couldn’t help but be curious of it.

 

The most enjoyment he’d ever felt was being accepted as an official “good” side. The anxiety he felt over revealing his name quickly followed by the wave of joy had to be similar, right? Like that's the most relatable experience he could think of. Feeling much fear over something but to have it turn out better than you expected.

 

But why would you willingly put yourself through that fear and worry? Was the pay off seriously that intense?

 

So back to his day, he’d managed to get himself so caught up in all these thoughts, that he’d started to spiral down, thinking about all the reasons why he didn’t understand it, why he’d probably never understand it. Things like his worth and uncharismatic self.

 

It had unsurprisingly turned into a panic attack. He’d somehow convinced himself no one was going to kiss him and he was likely going to die alone right that second because why not.

 

He’d collapsed against the wall, breath staggered and limbs heavy. He’d managed to pull himself slowly down the hall, stiff as his breath labored. As he passed the Prince’s room however, He’d fell slightly, left knee making contact with Roman’s door. The Creative side had answered the door almost immediately, a rose flourished in his palm.

 

Upon seeing the shape shaking at his feet, Roman had coaxed the other into his room, well versed in helping him calm down.

 

You really couldn’t live in the same mind as the embodiment of anxiety and not know tips and tricks of how to help.

 

Now back to the current, after Virgil felt he could breathe again, Roman had offered to watch a disney movie together. VIrgil honestly didn’t want to return to his room where he’d be at mercy of his head again, so he’d quickly accepted. So long as it wasn’t frozen or minions.

 

They’d settled on The Little Mermaid. Virgil was sure Roman had watched it more than a million times, but Virgil wasn’t really in the position to be calling people out as he was still shaking slightly from his earlier attack.

 

It was just as they got to the part with Ariel and Prince Eric in the rowboat as Sebastian sung _“Kiss the girl”_.

 

There it was again. That pesky kissing business. ANd once again, Virgil found himself spiraling down that well of questions. Only… he wasn’t alone this time. Prince Roman, Creativity, the actual personification of romance was with him. And as weird as it was to see different versions of his face this way, Roman was certainly… attractive.

 

What would kissing Roman be like? Certainly he’d know what he was doing. Creative and romantic. That’s definitely plus qualities.

 

And that’s when he’d metaphorically thrown himself under a bus. Now he was staring determinedly at the tv as Roman stared at him in disbelief and no doubt disgust.

 

Virgil shrugged with one arm, trying to appear like he wasn’t about to sink to the ground. “Forget it, Princey. It was a stupid thought.”

 

Roman did the look and look away thing again before huffing loudly, Virgil could almost see the Prince’s bangs flying up slightly even though he wasn’t looking, and paused the movie, turning to face Virgil. He swallowed thickly, not so subtly pulling up his hood. He stubbornly focused on the TV more intently.

 

“Virgil, I said it wasn’t stupid. But I’m just- Can you tell me what made you ask so suddenly?”

 

He shrugged his shoulder again. “I dunno. Just thought about it.”

 

“Thought about making out? Or making out with me?”

 

He was definitely flushed now. Virgil hunched down more into himself, grasping the edges of his hood to push pressure on the back of his head. It was always something that helped a little when he was feeling overwhelmed or attacked. IN this case, both. “Both?” He replied in an unsure, hushed voice.

 

Roman made a strange noise in the back of his throat before facing the TV as well. VIrgil flashed a quick look towards Roman to confirm the man was also a little more red than usual. Unfortunately Roman decided to look at him, which made Virgil look immediately away, flushing a little brighter.

 

“Is that- Does this… have anything to do with the panic attack you experienced?”

 

Staying silent, Virgil willed the Prince to do something, he wasn’t sure. Anything to change the subject or drop it. But he had no such luck, as the man just repeated his name, looking towards him again.

 

With a deep breath, VIrgil shrugged, both arms this time, and replied, “I guess?”

 

“You guess.”

 

Virgil huffed out a breath at that and turned to scowl at the Prince. “Yeah, _I guess_. Sorry I’m not ready to just spill out every detail of why I freaked the fuck out.”

 

Roman stiffened for a second before letting out an irritated breath and shaking his head. “That’s not what I meant, Anxiet- _Virgil_ . I Just meant that how could you _guess_ about whether or not the thought of making out and/or making out with me sends you into a state of panic.”

 

“It didn’t, I just-” He cut himself off with a quick intake of breath. He closed his eyes, taking a forced slow breath. He continued until his breathing was even again. Roman watched worriedly, if still confused, from beside him.

 

“Virgil?”

 

Virgil took one last breath, facing Roman more, though staring at his chest rather than his face. “I’m fine. It’s just- It’s not you. Or making out with you. It’s just… it’s dumb. Sorry.”

 

“Obviously it isn’t Virge. Whatever is wrong, please tell me. I’m beginning to grow worried for you. Is my presence having ill effect towards you? I can try to keep my distance if you’d prefer.”

 

Virgil shook his head quickly, finally meeting the Prince’s eyes. “No! No you don’t- It’s _really_ not that. I’m just..”

 

“You’re?” Roman encouraged.

 

Virgil sighed, knowing when he was cornered. If he dropped it now, Roman would just go on believing there was something he did to make Virgil react the way he did. And honestly, Virgil couldn’t do that to the guy. He may be an idiot, but the Prince really did usually have good intentions.

 

“I’ve….,” he started, feeling that overwhelming tumbling start in his stomach. But he needed to press on. So with his eyes held shut quite tightly, he pushed out, “I’ve never kissed anyone!”

 

He immediately drew back to the edge of the bed they were on, hands fidgeting against each other in his lap. He couldn’t bare to look at Roman.

 

He listened to the Prince make half attempts to speak before finally settling on a half choked laugh followed by, “Is that all?”

 

Virgil’s head snapped up quickly, meeting Roman’s eyes for a second before skirting away. “What do you mean, is that all?”

 

“Well- Well I- _Virgil_ , that really isn’t that big of a deal. I can’t really understand why such an issue upsets you this much.”

 

“Isn’t a big-  Oh _Fuck you,_ not like you’ve ever kissed anyone before!”

 

Roman scoffed, standing it and puffing out his chest in cocky self assurance. “I most certainly have! What kind of Prince do you think I am?”

 

Virgil blinked, feeling is short lived hatred melt into constant confusion. “Who have you kissed?” Certainly he’d have seen Roman kiss someone if he had, right? There were only so many of the sides around.

 

Roman actually looked offended as he sat back down. “My damsels of course.”

 

“... You’re… damsels.” Virgil couldn’t help the flat tone his voice took.

 

Roman however just nodded, a confident smirk on him. “Yes. Many princes and princesses choose to reward me in such ways. And after all, I have to be well prepare for when True Love's First kiss is called upon. What kind of Prince would I be if I didn’t know how to kiss my lover from their eternal slumber?”

 

Virgil felt tension drain from his shoulders as he rolled his eyes. “Oh. You almost got me. So you’ve pretty much only kissed yourself and your imagination.”

 

_“Excuse You.”_

 

“I mean technically, I’m right. You’re ‘damsels’ are all figments of your imagination that only you can interact with.”

 

_“They all exhibit their own personalities and-”_

 

“Which you create, therefore you control. It’s just like, a more evolved version of masturbation.”

 

_“I beg your pardon!”_

 

“Yeah yeah, thanks anyway, Princey. But I guess you’re in the same boat as me.”

 

“Why are you even so curious anyway? Is that why you asked me? So I could show you a kiss?”

 

Virgil looked away again, hating how embarrassed he felt. “I guess? I just- I don’t know… You’re fanciful and romantic and creative and stuff. I just thought that maybe… show me why everyone gets so crazy about them.”

 

“You don’t understand…”

 

Shaking his head, Virgil huffed looking at the TV again. “No! They’re just- How does smacking your lips together with someone  make everything okay? It _can’t_ be that good. But it’s in every movie ever! I just… I don’t get it.”

 

“Okay so let me get this straight; _Ha._ You’ve never been kissed before and therefore don’t understand the hype, so since I am the epitome of Romance and obviously a fantastic kisser, you thought to ask me to demonstrate, if you will.”

 

Virgil felt like he was sweating but he’d die before he took off his hoodie during _this_ conversation. “I guess.”

 

“I accept.”

 

His eyes shot wide as he looked to Roman. “I- What?”

 

“I accept your proposal to make out.” He faltered however, looking where he hoped Virgil’s eyes to be behind swooping bangs and a hood. “If the offer is still open I mean. We don’t have to.”

 

“Why do you… Why are you agreeing?”

 

Roman shrugged, shooting Virgil a smile, though his face was still red.

 

“I can see this is important to you, and honestly, I really am your best option.”

 

Virgil snorted before feeling his stomach turn in anxiety again. Though this time it wasn’t… as bad? It was different. Virgil didn’t quite know how to explain it just yet. He turned to also face Roman’s position on the bed they shared.”So… if we do this… what do I have to do?”

 

Rather than the teasing, Virgil was expecting, Roman’s smile turned sweet as he moved to appear more open. “You’ll just follow my lead. I can take care of everything.”

 

“You sure do seem confident.”

 

Roman shrugged. “I’m a Prince. I have to be. So? You want to do this? You can always think about it more if you aren’t sure.”

 

Feeling that odd unfamiliar nervousness increase, VIrgil bit his lip. He did want this. He wanted to know. _Needed_ to know. What was so good about kissing that it was able to hold anxiety at bay for a period of time afterwards.

 

Virgil knew he didn’t really have a choice. And honestly Roman was the only one he’d feel comfortable doing something like this with. Logan would make it too technical and Patton was…. Patton. VIrgil couldn’t kiss _Patton. He was too... Dad like._

 

He gnawed on his bottom lip for only a second before meeting Roman’s soft, red, eyes, and nodded. His stomach was tumbling in full effect now.

 

Roman nodded to Virgil, infuriatingly cute smile still in place. “You might want to take off your jacket. I think you’ll enjoy it more.” Virgil flushed, looking away.

 

“No.”

 

Roman laughed a full laugh, starting to remove his sash and unbutton his Prince coat. “If you insist, I however am still going to be taking this off. I don’t want you accidentally pulling on it.”

 

Virgil watched Roman remove the top, leaving him in his usual pants and a maroon form fitting shirt. VIrgil would be lying if he denied how good Prince looked in that shirt. But he was still confused as to why he was in it to begin with. It was just a…. Kiss right? Why would Virgil be pulling on shirts. Sure he’d seen it in movies but… surely that not how it actually was.

 

Finally, Roman extended his legs across the bed, patting the space between them. “Come now, my Dark Angel.”

 

Virgil rolled his eyes, biting back the weird fluttery feeling he felt. “Don’t- call me that.” He still moved into position however, feeling a little weird about being so close to the side. He was nearly in his lap, for fucks sake.

 

Roman only grinned, placing a careful hand on Virgil’s cheek, the other moving to his thigh. Virgil felt weirdly exposed, even though between the two of them he was the most covered. “Shush Virge. First kisses are all about Romance and Intimacy. I’m just trying to make this as best of an experience for you as I can.”

 

“You do this for all your Damsels?”

 

Pressing a thumb against VIrgil’s lower lip, causing an eruption of confusion in him, Roman shook his head. “You’re not a damsel. You’re much more than that. I kissed them as a reward for rescuing them. I’m kissing you as a request. This is all for you, Doom and gloom.”

 

Not really having a response to that, VIrgil furrowed his brows, not meeting Roman’s eyes again. “Yeah, whatever… just. Get on with it. I have things to-”

 

He was cut off by the sudden lips that were pressed to his own. His eyes widened as he sucked in a breath that mingled with a hint of whatever it was on Roman’s breath. He’d admit he was disappointed when Roman pulled back, as it was a nice feelings, but it wasn’t really anything to write home about.

 

He couldn’t help the disbelieving, “Was that it?” That slipped out.

 

Roman huffed. “Patience. You have to work up the chain. All in due time.”

 

Before he could reply, Roman was brushing Virgil’s hair to the side and pressing their lips together once more. Only this time-

 

He was moving them. And wow okay that felt nice. Roman breathed a laugh against Virgil’s lips, sending a confusing tremor down his spine. “Stop staring at me and kiss back, Angel.”

 

Virgil couldn’t fight the huff of a short laugh as well as he pulled back slightly. “Just Angel this time?”

 

Roman rolled his eyes, moving a hand to the base of Virgil’s neck. They were bigger than he thought they were. FIngers tightened slightly as Roman whispered, “Stop talking,” before kissing him for the third time. This time Virgil’s head was tilted slightly, allowing their lips to entwine a little more.

 

 _FInally_ , Virgil let his eyes slip shut, trying to copy what Roman was doing to him.

 

Every slid of lips felt like sparks from the base of his neck down his spine. Roman made a soft noise, a hand pressing against Virgil’s lower back, the other still tangled in his hair. He was pulled just a little closer but as he was positioned, legs crossed, between Roman's legs, it wasn't much closer.

 

Roman huffed irritatingly against Virgil's lips and moved his hand from his back to his thigh. Virgil's Stomach flipped as Roman gently pulled his legs apart, placing them on either side of Roman's waist. He didn't stop kissing him throughout this, though slowly now.

 

As nice as this was, Virgil still couldn't see why this was something to freak out about. He kissed back like Roman was, though awkward, hands in his lap. He probably wasn't doing it right. Roman was probably regretting agreeing to do this. Virgil felt himself falter in the kiss, fists tightening in his sleeves. This was a dumb idea.

 

 _Feeling_ his anxiety getting worked up, Roman grunted, licking Virgil's bottom lip and pulling the back of his hair. Virgil gasped, body twitching forward as his hands grabbed onto the bottom of Roman's shirt.

 

“Stop thinking, just kiss me. You're doing great,” Roman whispered before tugging Virgil's hair again to warrant a gasp. As he did so he also pushed his tongue to slide against Virgil's, curling it up against the roof of his mouth.

 

It felt like fire was licking up his spine now. Virgil made a soft involuntary noise as he pressed closer, trying to weakly mimic the action. He felt Roman grip at the back of his jacket, and suddenly he wanted those hands on him. Scratching against skin rather than cloth.

 

Then his tongue was being pulled and guided between Roman's lips and he felt his heart stutter. Virgil actually moaned, muffled between the two of them, and reached up to grab onto something. His hand made its way to curl around Roman's neck, the other gripping his shirt over where his heart was pounding in his chest.

 

He could feel Roman breath a laugh against him. Only moments later a hand was pulling the zipper down on his jacket and Virgil all but threw it off, leaving him in just a plain black t shirt, wanting to get closer to Roman again.

 

They pressed against each other once more, kiss growing more and more desperate and passionate by the second. For a minute, Virgil felt confident enough to try and take the lead, but Roman quickly shot that idea down, easily kissing him into submission.

 

He was breathless. Light headed. Buzzing. Roman was kissing, holding, scratching, pulling, rubbing, _everything_ and yet Virgil wanted more. He wanted more of this attention, this feeling. He wrapped his arms around Roman's neck, legs tightening around his waist as well, trying to pull Roman impossibly closer. He knew he looked like a wreck. Flushed, needy, and disheveled. But for once it didn't matter what he looked like because Roman was _touching_ him and it felt _good_. He whined as Roman was pulling away however, trying to follow. Roman placed a hand in his chest though, holding him back.

 

“Are you okay, my love?”

 

Slowly, Virgil opened his eyes to a wonderful site.

 

Roman, though still somehow looking in control of himself, was red with swollen lips, hair sticking up at odd angles, and breathing labored. His hand on Virgil's chest felt heavy and left a desirable warmth where it pressed.

 

He nodded slowly. “Y-yeah. Why wouldn't I be?”

 

He smirked and Virgil wasn't sure if he wanted to slap it off or kiss him again. He was leaning more towards the latter.

 

“You just seemed a little faint near the end there. You were shaking too.”

 

“I was?” He asked, staring.

 

Roman licked his lips subconsciously and nodded. Virgil followed that tongue, almost deflating when it disappeared.

 

“If this is getting too much, we can sto-"

 

“No!” He blushed hard, suddenly unable to look at the Prince. “we don't- you don't have to stop. I'm good. We can keep going.”

 

He seemed to realise what he said just a second later, cutting Roman off before he had a chance to respond. Virgil let go of Roman's neck, drawing his arms close to himself again, looking down.

 

“Unless- unless I was bad. Which I mean you don't have to keep kissing me if I'm not doing it right. I'm probably not, right? That's why you stopped? I'm sorry.”

 

Rather than the scorn he was expecting however, Roman hummed slightly, pressing a soft kiss to Virgil's forehead. “You're doing wonderful, Virgil. I'd say for a first kiss, this sure is turning out much better than I expected.”

 

His head snapped up at that. “Really?”

 

Roman pushed his hair back that was falling into his eyes and grinned at Virge. “Yes, of course, my dearest dark angel. I have no reason to lie. You set my heart a flame~!”

 

Meanwhile, Virgil had stopped breathing momentarily.

 

Not noticing his delima, Roman continued talking as if he hadn’t just made Virgil’s chest seize up with unbridled attraction.

 

“I will also like to add, that while this is really rather quite nice, my back is beginning to be a bit of a bothersome. If you… would like to continue our endeavors… perhaps we could lay down?” He looked up with long lashes and flushed cheeks and lips, certainly doing nothing to keep Virgil from dying.

 

He took a shaky inhale, nodding quickly. Roman laughed good naturedly. “Wonderful! As crass as this is to ask, would you prefer to be above, or underneath me, darkest prince. As this is ultimately a learning experience for you, we can do whichever you choose.”

 

That sobered up Virgil rather quickly. _A learning experience._ Right. Of course, Prince was only doing this as a favor to Virgil. It wasn’t like he _actually_ wanted to kiss him. No one did. And why would they? He was mean, and rude, and intrusive. Who would want to even be around him. Prince and the others _had_ to. They didn’t have a choice. And if Roman had refused him, then things would’ve been awkward and even more strained between them. What if he only said yes because he _had_ too?

 

Virgil only then realised how closed off he’d become. He’d managed to pull out of Roman’s lap, legs halfway near his chest and half way still between Roman’s own, his arms were wrapped tightly around his stomach, and his head was down. Roman had sat up straighter during this and was carefully calling his name.

 

Virgil glanced up, feeling incredibly guilty. “I’m sorry.”

 

“You’re…? There’s nothing to be sorry about, Virgil. What’s going on in your emo head of yours right now?”

 

He shook his head, biting his lip that was much more sensitive, and looked down. “I didn’t mean to make you feel obligated to do this. We don’t have to continue. I’ll just…. Go.”

 

He started to pull back farther, but Roman was having none of it. He grabbed hold of Virgil’s legs still near him and pulled him back easily, placing them on either side of his hips again. He frowned down worriedly, concern etched into his face. Placing his hands firmly on VIrgil’s thighs, he shook his head. “By all means, if you actually do want to stop, we can, but I’m not allowing you to leave thinking such things. I _wanted_ to kiss you, Virgil. I _would still_ like to kiss you. If I hadn’t then I wouldn’t have agreed to begin with. Kissing isn’t really a one way thing, padre. It takes participation from both sides. And I may be an actor, but I don’t know if I’d put that much effort into a role I didn’t fully enjoy.”

 

“But… If you’d said no then it would’ve been weird. Agree was probably just-”

 

“Nope! None of that. What did I just say?”

 

Virgil stared, not really knowing what to say. He opened his mouth but closed it quickly, shrugging.

 

Sighing, Roman rolled his eyes, beginning to move his left hand up and down Virgil’s thigh, making it _very_ difficult to keep his self doubt and paranoia in mind.

 

“I _said_ I want to still kiss you. I assure you I am _very_ into this.”

 

“Are you…. Are you sure? Like… you wouldn’t enjoy it more with your royal subjects or whatever?”

 

“ _Damsels_ , and I… I have to say that-” Suddenly it was Roman’s turn to grow embarrassed, looking away briefly. “Though I still _refuse_ to abide by what you had said about them, I have to admit that… you are much better at this than them. You’re more….”

 

“Real?” VIrgil supplied dryly.

 

The prince rolled his eyes. “ _No._ You’re more… individual? Fresh? I simply cannot think of a word to describe what kissing you is like compared to my Damsels, but I promise it is a positive thing.”

 

“Yeah I’m sticking with real.”

 

“ _God,_ you’re so infuriating!”

 

“What happened to ‘ _my dearest dark angel_ ’? Are we done with the sappy pet names?”

 

“ _ANYWAYS. As I was saying._ I would be happy to continue this. Anything to get you to _stop talking._ ”

 

Virgil laughed, feeling relaxed again. It was weird. Just a minute ago he’d felt his anxiety building and was sure it was going to burrow into his chest again, controlling him. But after few sweet words and some pointless banter, he felt stable again. It really was something that _should_ unerve him, but with Roman looking at him like that and slowly moving his hand against him, it wasn’t exactly the first concern on his mind.

 

“Kiss me?” Virgil hoped the nervousness he felt wasn’t as evident. He’d already _done_ this part. Why was he still nervous?

 

Roman smiled, wrapping his arms around Virgil’s waist. If a finger slid into the back of his pants, as another slowly stroked the exposed skin at the bottom of his tshirt, VIrgil really didn’t have the strength to call him on it.

 

“You never answered my question.” His eyes were a little hooded as he stared intently at Virge. He wasn’t used to being under this much attention. In fact, Virgil wasn’t really used to being under much attention at all when he wasn’t arguing with the others. He flushed and looked down between them.

 

“What uhh. What question?”

 

He chuckled and lifted up Virgil’s face with his right hand, left slowly adding more fingers to stroke at heated skin. “Whether you’d like to lay above me, or beneath me as I kiss you again.” His red eyes burrowed into Virgil’s brown, causing his breath to catch in his throat again. He should be _embarrassed_ by Roman’s callous openness to what they were doing. Not- Not _turned on_. Jesus fuck.

 

“Uhm…,” he said intelligently. “Does it really… matter?” Honestly his brain was having trouble connecting. So being beneath or above the Prince wasn’t a choice he could determine. Both sounded unreal. He still wasn’t fully over the first kiss they shared.

 

Roman however, huffed in response, clearly able to make simple decisions. “It appears we need to demonstrate both. _Everyone_ has a preference, my dear. Or at least a desire for one a little more than the other.”

 

“Then… which do you prefer?” He asked, still breathing a little heavy as Roman’s hand scratched a little at his back. And by the slight twitch in his lips, Virgil was sure the man new just what he was doing. The bastard.

 

The hand holding VIrgil’s chin moved up to brush some hair back, cupping Virgil’s face. He immediately flushed. “You’ll just have to figure that out for yourself.”

 

Laying back, Roman held Virgil against him, pulling him down as well. VIrgil only barely had half the mind to readjust his legs to stretch out along Roman’s own. The taller man smirked upon noticing didn’t quite reach his height as they’d laid down.

 

VIrgil quickly moved more up, laying over the other. It was a little uncomfortable, but he didn’t want to get off, in fear of upsetting Ro so he remained still. He used his arms to hold himself up on either side of Roman’s broad shoulders. Roman put an end to that however by pulling him down to fully lay on top of him, hand previously teasing a small expanse of skin, now easily siding  up and down Virgil’s spine beneath his shirt. He shivered slightly in reaction, watching Roman’s eyes narrow and darken at the action.

 

The hand still cupping his face, pulled him ever closer until they were a breath away again. Virgil watched Roman’s eyes slip shut as he pressed forward, locking their lips once more. After a moment, Roman began to move against him, arms holding him in place and his leg coming up to slip between VIrgil’s own. His own eyes quickly closed as Roman’s mouth worked it’s earlier magic.

 

It was nice. As before but…. Not as much? And it must’ve been apparent, as only moments later, Roman was stopping, looking at Virgil again with wide eyes and a small frown. “Something wrong, Angel?” He carded a careful hand through the back of Virgil’s hair.

 

Virgil shook his head. “N-no? I don’t think so.”

 

“You seem distracted this time. Did I say something else to discourage you earlier?”

 

“No! I- I don’t know. Nothing’s wrong.”

 

“Sounds like there is. Don’t be afraid to tell me if I do something you don’t like. Two way street, remember?”

 

“You won’t… be upset? If I don’t like something?”

 

Roman shook his head, pulling out a knot gently with his hands. “Of course not. How could I enjoy making you do something you’re uncomfortable with?”

 

“Okay well.. I’m not… very comfortable? Like this? I’m sorry.”

 

“Like what, laying on me?”

 

Virgil nodded, looking intently at Roman’s chest. “I guess.”

 

“Okay, then let’s try this.”

 

In a quick second, Virgil was flipped to the other side of the bed as Roman easily rolled them over, propping himself on one arm, his other still firmly wrapped around Virgil’s waist. Virgil would forever deny the yelp he let out as they rolled, as well as the way his eyes immediately gravitated to the unexpected muscles on display next to his head. He supposed fighting Dragon Witches all the time could be quite the workout.

 

Before Virgil had a chance to shout at him for the sudden change, Roman had pressed their lips together once more, wasting no time. He still had a knee pushed up between Virgil’s legs, slowly pushing further and further up until it couldn’t go any higher, earning a short gasp. Roman immediately took advantage of Virgil’s opened mouth. As the light headed feeling rushed back in, Virgil figured out which position Roman prefered.

 

Virgil let out a soft noise as Roman did _that thing_ again with his tongue, sliding hotly against Virgil’s own. He really hated using that term, but as they moved together, he really couldn’t think of a better word. Not with Roman’s leg subtly pushing into him and mouth pressing against him. And then the hand on his back was pulling his thigh up to Roman’s waist, shorting out what was left of Virgil’s brain.

 

Roman pushed his hips down with a short whine that had Virgil arching up against him. He blindly reached out, managing to grasp onto brown hair and Roman’s hips. The man above hiim made a noise of approval and seemed to kiss him more fiercely, leaving Virgil feeling a little dazed.

 

This kept up for a bit, Virgil slowly losing his breath with each time Roman’s mouth worked against him. His head was fuzzy and chest tight but in a nice way. IN a way that left trails of fire licking up his spine and desire coursing through his blood. He was holding onto Roman with everything he had, both arms clenched around him and one leg on his waist, the other pressing against the Prince’s rear.

 

Just as his lungs felt too short of air however, Roman pulled back from nearly sucking on Virgil’s own tongue, drawing out all kinds of noises, releasing their combined seal with a wet pop. He huffed out heated breath for a moment, stilling his constant torture of slow hip thrusts and applied pressure. Virgil had just enough time to catch his breath before Roman was pressing long hot kisses to the base of his throat. He sealed his lips around a pale patch of skin and quickly drew it into his mouth, wrenching a completely wreck, “Ro!” from Virgil’s throat. Roman hummed, pressing his tongue flat against the now reddened spot, pressing his hips firmly down again, before moving to another part of his neck a little higher this time.

 

Virgil’s mind was spinning. He felt dazed and distant, in the best of ways, as Roman pulled noises from him he never even knew he could make. He felt a little bad, just laying there in his pleasurably overwhelmed state as Roman did these _things_ to him, but then there was a quick press of teeth into his abused skin and Virgil found it difficult to think of much else.

 

Another quick bite was pressed into a slick spot and Virgil couldn’t take it anymore. His hand fisted in Roman’s hair, pulling a _delicious_ shout from him as he dragged the man’s mouth back up to his own. He pressed open mouthed, sloppy kisses against him, moving more frantically beneath him. Roman seemed to understand what Virgil was needing however, as his hand quickly left Virgil’s thigh, sliding up his shirt to push against his soft skin. He was just gripping and rubbing at random parts of his sides and stomach and chest, adding to the inferno that was building in his abdomen.

 

VIrgil couldn’t help but think about how he’d never been touched like this, much less wanted to be touched like this before tonight. Before he had Roman’s tongue and hands touching him _everywhere_ and pulling the desire out of him. Roman’s knee pressed particularly in the right spot that had VIrgil gasping against Roman’s mouth.

 

With a lecherous smirk, Virgil felt the fire in him spike as Roman slowed down their kiss. Virgil whined in the back of his throat, grasping at him as he tried to speed things up again, but Roman stayed resolute. Grabbing hold of Virgil’s wrists, Roman linked both their hands together, pressing them into the bed as he kissed him. A long groan slipped between them, and though Virgil assumed it was from him, he wasn’t entirely sure.

 

With a soft bite on his bottom lip, Roman separated them again, despite Virgil’s head coming up with intents to follow. He just pressed his hips down again, moving to suck at another part of Virgil’s sensitive neck. Virgil couldn’t help the noises that left him again as Roman moved his hand up to grasp the wooden bars holding up the headboard that _most certainly weren’t a part of the full wooden headboard before_. He did the same to the his other hand before both of Roman’s large hands were pressing against his heated skin, shoving up his shirt to his arms.

 

The fire kept building and building until it was nearly _burning_ within him. Everything was so _hot_ and _intense_. He couldn’t think, he could hardly breath, every time his mouth opened it was to shout some ebaressing noise, occasionally mingled in with Roman’s name panted out in quick syllables.

 

It was too hot. Too much. Too much? _Too much_ . And then Roman’s hand was pushing his thigh against the bed, squeezing right where it met his hip and everything turned _toohottoomuchtoobright_ . His breathing turned from desperate to panicked in a quick second, _too much too much too much_ on narration in his hazy mind.

 

The fire turned icy, still burning but now in a very different way inside him. Roman stilled upon the sudden lack of reaction he was getting, a worried, “Virge?” on his lips.

 

Virgil kept his eyes screwed shut, breathing sporadically. His arms were locked on the headboard, chest heaving up and down. Roman quickly pulled away. VIrgil could feel his eyes boring into him.

 

“Virgil, what’s wrong. What’s happening?”

 

He shook his head, feeling tears build up from frustration. He’d asked for this. He’d wanted Roman to do this to him. But now his chest was filled with terror and he couldn’t make it go away. He couldn’t move, he couldn’t focus, he couldn’t do anything but disappoint everyone.

 

A hand brushed away a tear that had fallen, but upon it being unexpected, Virgil let out a pained, “Stop!” more tears falling. He could hear Roman pull back immediately, getting off of him and moving far enough away on the bed to no longer touch him.

 

It helped a little, but he still couldn’t manage to open his eyes or stop the sudden violent pounding in his chest.

 

 _“Virgil please._ Please, darkest angel, I don’t know how to help if you don’t work with me.”

 

Trembling, Virgil tried to slow his breathing down. Tried to open his eyes. Anything to just comply, to not disappoint, not frustrate Ro who had been so kind and caring, but he _couldn’t_ . He just… VIrgil let out a sob, flinching at the sudden noise startling him. He shivered in a really terrible way as his head screamed at him. _“Too much,”_ he forced out, jaw clamping shut immediately after.

 

He was too exposed. Too open. His arms were still above his head, going numb with how tightly he was gripping the bars. He still couldn’t move despite wanting nothing more than to curl into himself, disappearing forever. He could hear Roman suck in a breath. He hated him. He had to. How could he not? After what had happened. After shutting down on him like that. _Twice now_.

 

Suddenly the lighting behind his eyelids was dimmed considerably and the air seemed to cool, helping the burning cool off. Something soft was draped over him, and despite his eyes being closed, Virgil just knew it had to be his hoodie. Oh so slowly, Virgil managed to let go of the headboard, reaching down to grab at his jacket. His arms felt dead as blood rushed back into them but the soft fabric beneath his hands help ground him enough to open his eyes.

 

Breathing still labored, He frantically looked around the room until he landed on Roman. The Prince was a complete and worried mess. His clothes more mussed up than they were before, hair limp and off from sweat and hands manipulating it. Lips still rosey and flushed. But his face was white and eyes panicked. He was scared and Virgil was guilty.

 

Virgil bit his lip hard, a pained, “I’m sorry,” forced out. Roman’s eyes widened as he leaned further towards Virgil, still keeping his distance. “Nonono, my sweet. You did nothing wrong. Can you breathe with me?”

 

Virgil continued to stare, holding his jacket tighter.

 

“Come on, angel, you can do it. Breath in for four seconds, remember?”

 

Feeling his chest loosen, if only a fraction, he nodded with sharp movements, and tried to do as he was told. It took a few tries, but he’d finally managed it. After he did, Roman tried for a smile but it looked strained. “Wonderful. Perfect. Hold for seven now, beautiful.”

 

Virgil nodded, back still stiff. Roman moved a little closer, obviously wanting to reach out. It was in his blood to _act_. To physically beat any issues. He didn’t do so well on the sidelines, feeling helpless.

 

Just as his chest started to pull tightly again, Roman’s smile broke through once more. “You’re doing so great right now, Virge. Now let go for eight, okay? Can you do that?”

 

Virgil quickly released his breath, feeling the metaphorical weight on his chest lessening some more. But just as he finished breathing, Roman moved a little quick, sending his heart rate to spike back up. Roman cursed, turning his face away before facing VIrgil again, smile wobbling. “You wanna go through it again?”

 

He nodded, already pulling in air.

 

It took two more countdowns before Virgil felt okay enough to grab desperately at Roman’s extended hand. And then one last time before he felt okay enough to actually meet Ro’s eyes. A watery, “I’m sorry,” was repeated before he sobbed again, hunching in on himself.

 

“Can I touch you now?” Roman asked desperately.Virgil Nodded as tears made their way down his face. Roman took no hesitation to pull Virgil up into his lap once more, holding him in a tight hug and combing gentle fingers through his hair. He also finished pulling Virgil’s shirt back down and pulling his jacket across his shoulders.

 

Once he’d managed to stop crying, Virgil sighed deeply, pushing more into Roman’s chest. He felt drained and more than a little embarrassed. He pulled back, not meeting the other's eyes. Roman let his hand fall from Virgil’s hair to settle heavily on his shoulder, squeezing gently. He sniffed slightly, rubbing at his eyes with his sleeve, not caring for his already ruined eye shadow.

 

“Are you okay now?”

 

Virgil gave a harsh, wet laugh, looking away. “Define okay.”

 

Roman huffed and started massaging his collar bone with his thumb. “I apologize for taking things too far, I… really had not intended to, they just sort of… happened? And That wasn’t right of me to take advantage of you like that. I am truly sorry, Virgil.”

 

He looked up, confused. Apologize? “Ro, you don’t have anything to apologize for. I’m the one that didn’t say anything. I asked you to kiss me, not the other way around.”

 

Roman shook his head. “Maybe so but I was in control of the situation. I’m more experienced here, I shouldn’t have gotten so ahead of myself like that.”

 

Virgil shrugged in response, not wanting to fight him on it. He was too tired. He looked around, not wanting to get up, instead just laying down and passing out right there, but knew he couldn’t stay. Not after what happened. So he started to turn, getting off the bed, only to wobble back and fall back onto the bed from his shaky legs.

 

Roman immediately caught him, letting him lean against his side. “What are you doing!?”

 

He shrugged again, red from many things. “Going to my room?”

 

“Are we not going to talk about what happened?”

 

He bit his sensitive lip. “What’s there to talk about.”

 

“We’re not doing this again.”

 

“Doing what?”

 

Roman sighed heavily, backing up. He patted the bed softly. “Lay down, you can stay the night here. I can sleep on the floor if it makes you uncomfortable.”

 

“Or I could just go to my room and be alone.”

 

“Yeah but then you’d blow everything out of proportion and somehow make up some outlandish explanation for tonight that isn’t entirely true. So I’d really rather we skip that part and you stay in here with me so I can continuously reassure you that I do not in fact hate you. I actually care about you a whole lot.”

 

He… had him there. Still shaky, Virgil nodded and slowly made his way across the bed to lay down. Roman quickly covered him with the blanket, a blessing really as the room had grown quite cold in Roman’s attempts to shock him out of the panic attack.

 

Roman stayed sitting, petting at Virgil’s hair. “Are you really okay?”

 

Virgil sighed, leaning into the hand and letting his eyes shut again. He nodded, “As okay as I’ll ever be. Just tired now.”

 

Roman nodded. “Do you know what triggered it this time?”

 

To that, Virgil shrugged, angling his head down. “I dunno. Everything? It just…”

 

“Was too much,” Roman finished. Virgil nodded in response. “I’ll admit it was even getting a bit intense for me. I really should have been more careful.”

 

VIrgil sighed. “I already told you, it wasn’t your-”

 

“No matter whose fault it is. What’s important is that it’s over.”

 

They fell into an uneasy silence. He could feel Roman holding something back.

 

The hand in his hair stilled. “Virgil I….” He cut himself off, with a quick intake of air. “You should get some rest. I’ll be on the floor.” He pulled away, but before he got far, Virgil had grabbed hold of his wrist.

 

“You can uhm. Stay here.. In your bed. With me. If you want to. Y-You don’t have to stay on the floor.”

 

Roman bit his lip, sending a short spike through him despite his earlier reaction to it. “Are you sure?”

 

Virgil shrugged. “I mean why not. You’ve already seen me covered in snot so.”

 

Roman griminaced, glancing down at his shirt that was covered in said fluid. “You have a pint. Give me just a second, my love, to change. Would you like something as well?”

 

He only accepted some pants, opting out of the shirt. Roman changed in his in room bathroom he conjored while Virgil difficultly shucked his pants off without getting up, pulling on Roman’s. It wasn’t long before they both were next to each other, beneath the soft red blanket with a foot between them still.

 

It took only a few minutes of tense silence for Roman to crack. Virgil sighed, knowing it had only been a matter of time. The man was terrible at keeping his thoughts to himself.

 

“Despite… tonight’s sour conclusion… Virgil, I was wondering, if maybe you would… be interested in doing this again?”

 

“What, like… Watching disney movies and making out?”

 

Roman, hands twitching to hold onto VIrgil’s. He couldn’t see it, but by the slight movement in the blanket, Virgil knew he was trying. He took pity on the side and grabbed hold of one.

 

“I was mostly referring to the latter, but both sound wonderful, yes.”

 

Biting the inside of his cheek, Virgil shrugged. “Why would you want to?”

 

His face was being lifted by gentle hands and red, warm eyes struggled to keep his eye contact. “ _Because,_ my dark angel, I enjoy kissing you. I enjoy _being_ with you.And I’ll tell you that as many times as I need to until you believe it.”

 

“Seriously what is up with the dark angel thing? DId that just happen?”

 

Roman shrugged, laying a hand against VIrgil’s neck. He brushed his thumb across a particularly large hickey. He may have…. Gotten too ahead of himself there as well. “I’m not sure? My nicknames for you happen naturally. That one just came to me in the moment and stuck.”

 

Virgil’s breath quickened slightly as Roman felt along his neck, but he was still calm, smiling slightly, so Roman didn’t stop. “If you say so, pretty boy.”

 

“Aww, you think I’m pretty?”

 

VIrgil rolled his eyes, moving closer to rest against Romans broad chest. Roman had to keep his shout of how cute the image was. Truly too pure.

 

Instead he wrapped an arm tight around his waist, squeezing gently. “Are you really going to sleep in that hoodie?”

 

With a yawn, Virgil casted him an odd look. “Yeah? I usually do.”

 

Roman shook his head, falling silent. Before the other had a chance to sleep however, Roman let out a loud, “Hey, wait a minute!” successfully cutting off his attempt.

 

_“What.”_

 

“You never answered my question! Of whether you’d be interested in doing this again or not.”

 

Virgil flushed once more, not looking up. “Depends. Would you still be doing _this_ with your damsels?”

 

Roman hummed, rubbing Virgil’s back slowly. “No, I think not. Like I said. They don’t really compare to you.”

 

Virgil huffed, trying to disguise his smile, but Roman clearly saw it. “Damn right I’m better than glorified Masturbation.”

 

_“Virgil! It is not!”_

 

“Pretty sure it is, Princy.”

 

_“Go to sleep you heathen.”_

 

How did that one song go? It started out with a kiss, how did it end up like this? Different context, but the lyrics were right. Virgil laughed in response, pressing a quick kiss to Roman’s chin before settling back down. Roman grinned, willing the lights in the room to turn off, pressing a soft kiss to VIrgil’s forehead before he too settled down, holding Virgil tight against him.

 

It was only a kiss.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm so sorry. This is probably terrible oml I wrote most of this high af. I just needed a distraction from my Connor Murphy fic and I'm painfully single so like lmao. Kill me. Also shitty song reference at the end is shitty because how to end a fic, tell me please.
> 
> You guys can thank Elliot and Aam for this one, kids. Mostly El though. [Squints]


End file.
